red tape and roses

it's the 9th day and 10th night without my beloved Schnookums. ravi's confessed it feels like 9 months, i on the other hand feel like it's been only 9 hours. thank God for the grace of godforsaken work terrorised by a blur chinese, an anal argentinian, a lying indian and a square brazilian. it keeps me... well, occupied.

i knew organising a wedding was going to be tough, but i did not know it was going to be this tough. luckily i have a super-organised friend helping me for the reception in july. but the religious ceremony in february's going to be a bitch. all that documentation, endorsing, certificate here and there - just to get married. civil weddings have it good.

i thought they were encouraging the young to get married and make babies!

i've gone berserk since i started my wedding research on saturday. seeing happy pictures of newlyweds only made me miss ravi painfully. by sunday afternoon, i knew i had to stop or i'd go mad.

on top of that, the parents have their own ideas of what is good for ME. mom's OK, but dad's playing the ego trip again (he was the ONE reason guns are banned in singapore).

after all that red tape that made me see red, parental pressures kinda tipped me off. i imploded, and then exploded. if that's chemically possible.

but usually, after that kind of meltdown, you naturally take it easy. i'm back to my ohwhatthefucks and fuckits.

once february's over, we need to get ready for not only the reception in july, but also to move away permanently from this house, and (hopefully) temporarily from singapore. i do not know what will happen 2 or 3 years down the road, if we decide to come back to singapore or move away again.

but i guess time will tell.

this was the last picture we took before i sent ravi off at the airport. we look blissful, and i was, even after that. i knew then, in that bliss, even when we were away from each other, that our love had reached a level i did not expect to reach. that we were able to 'feel' each other without being physically near. and then i ask myself, 'finally, is this love?"